#1: Be a healthy, happy mom.
I have not had a hysterical, insane moment of this entire pregnancy. I've been pretty damn chill, and I hope I can continue to be calm during labor, delivery, and the (gulp) REST OF MY LIFE as a parent.
I don't want to cry over everything. I don't want to become hypervigilant. I don't want my baby to feed off of any of her mother's negative, stressed vibes, because I don't intend on feeling negative, stressed, self-important or defeated.
I'll probably re-read this entry and mock myself in a month or so.
I plan on being confident, understanding that this process is the epitome of on-the-job training, and laughing at myself when things don't go according to plan...which they never do.
I also plan on setting an example of healthy living for this kid by using my super awesome Livestrong indoor cycling bike, continuing to cook dinner almost nightly, and getting outdoors as often as possible with baby and pupster.
But over all, my main goal is to be happy and to laugh often. If I'm happy, hopefully baby girl will be happy too.
#2: Stop being afraid of Spanish.
I stopped taking my classes last summer because the Spanish language literally made me feel like vomiting. It was a weird associative thing having to do with being newly pregnant in Honduras and throwing up all the time.
I've been procrastinating registering for the Spanish Skype classes I wanted to do since July.This was a resolution from last year that I want to follow through on.
Last year, my reward for doing six months of classes was my trip to Honduras. I'm hoping to go to Spain next with husband and baby, and be able to get around the country with my bad-ass fluency.
#3: Figure out a way to increase readership on this blog.
I mean this is mainly a place for me to journal, but it would be nice to figure out a way to write for an audience and dust off that sad journalism and communications degree languishing in it's cardboard tube.
Goals I let go of:
- Writing a novel.
- Becoming more proficient at guitar/singing.
- Learning to dance.
- Joining groups to become more social.
- Wearing a bikini by a certain date.
- Getting a Ph. D by a certain date.
Not to say that I don't want to any of these things. I'm just not going to feel guilty anymore about not pursuing these goals. They will happen if they are meant to happen, but if they don't I am not less of a person. The pressure I put on myself year after year to complete these tasks, and then failing at them has caused me at least a decade of angst. But no more.
This entry became rather manifesto like despite my best efforts not to let it. Oh well. Adios.